Comments on: The Way Kids Choose to Show Independence http://www.whatsgottago.com/2007/05/01/the-way-kids-choose-to-show-independence/ Sweat the Small Stuff: Ranting about the little peeves in life Mon, 13 Oct 2008 15:58:03 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.6.2 By: Ali http://www.whatsgottago.com/2007/05/01/the-way-kids-choose-to-show-independence/#comment-2180 Ali Tue, 01 May 2007 18:34:10 +0000 http://www.whatsgottago.com/2007/05/01/the-way-kids-choose-to-show-independence/#comment-2180 Well I will give you a small ray of hope and tell you there is differing levels of teenage defiance. Just like training a dog…if you neglect housebreaking a dog when it is a puppy no amount of rolled up newspaper is gonna keep a 5 year old dog from peeing on your rug. So many parents from lack of time, lack of no how or just plain lack of caring make their small children understand the house rules and that parents make as well as enforce these rules. The screaming 3 year old that throws a fit in Toys R Us and gets the power ranger will grow up to be the 13 year old that says, “whatever…” when told to put on the sun screen. All of it boils down to respect…my 15 (16 in 4 days)daughter has been made aware of the house rules…she has been taught respect…she doesn’t have to agree with the rules or mine or my husband’s ruling but the rules stand. If she doesn’t listen…she loses her currency be it iPod, cell phone, computer…whatever makes the most dent in her teenage ego that week…just like a crate helps train a puppy…boundaries helps with a child. We are not overly strict but we do expect a certain level of respect of us and of herself. If it had been my daughter she would have said “whatever” once and been out of the sun enjoying her camping weekend in the trailer. And if the attitude kept up…we would have packed up and gone home. I am raising a person that needs to be able to take what life has to offer her and not think she can get away with disrespect and not following authority. I feel very sad for your friend’s teenage daughter as she needed boundaries set when she was younger. Jeremy yours are young…you can help make the teenage years easier for you as well as them. My husband and I never spanked her but taught her by having every action have a consequence. Her choice to have it a good one versus a bad one. Good Luck! Well I will give you a small ray of hope and tell you there is differing levels of teenage defiance. Just like training a dog…if you neglect housebreaking a dog when it is a puppy no amount of rolled up newspaper is gonna keep a 5 year old dog from peeing on your rug. So many parents from lack of time, lack of no how or just plain lack of caring make their small children understand the house rules and that parents make as well as enforce these rules. The screaming 3 year old that throws a fit in Toys R Us and gets the power ranger will grow up to be the 13 year old that says, “whatever…” when told to put on the sun screen. All of it boils down to respect…my 15 (16 in 4 days)daughter has been made aware of the house rules…she has been taught respect…she doesn’t have to agree with the rules or mine or my husband’s ruling but the rules stand. If she doesn’t listen…she loses her currency be it iPod, cell phone, computer…whatever makes the most dent in her teenage ego that week…just like a crate helps train a puppy…boundaries helps with a child.
We are not overly strict but we do expect a certain level of respect of us and of herself. If it had been my daughter she would have said “whatever” once and been out of the sun enjoying her camping weekend in the trailer. And if the attitude kept up…we would have packed up and gone home. I am raising a person that needs to be able to take what life has to offer her and not think she can get away with disrespect and not following authority. I feel very sad for your friend’s teenage daughter as she needed boundaries set when she was younger. Jeremy yours are young…you can help make the teenage years easier for you as well as them. My husband and I never spanked her but taught her by having every action have a consequence. Her choice to have it a good one versus a bad one. Good Luck!

]]> By: Melissa Morris http://www.whatsgottago.com/2007/05/01/the-way-kids-choose-to-show-independence/#comment-2176 Melissa Morris Tue, 01 May 2007 16:15:04 +0000 http://www.whatsgottago.com/2007/05/01/the-way-kids-choose-to-show-independence/#comment-2176 I wish I could tell you it's not so but it is. I always thought my kids would never act that way but I am starting to believe that nature takes its course and kids go through stages. Yet I don't think I was allowed to behave that way. Either times have changed or perhaps it is the air? I wish you the best. Melissa I wish I could tell you it’s not so but it is. I always thought my kids would never act that way but I am starting to believe that nature takes its course and kids go through stages.

Yet I don’t think I was allowed to behave that way. Either times have changed or perhaps it is the air?

I wish you the best.
Melissa

]]>