In the store the other day, I was making my usual rounds with balancing the kids (another rant for another day) and the task ahead of me. I hear behind me the voice of an ever so helpful store clerk. “Can I help you Ma’am?” Ma’am? I turned around only to be greeted by a familiar face. The young chap that had just called me Ma’am was a friend of my little brother. I said “Excuse me…I am not a Ma’am”
When did I become a Ma’am??? A Ma’am was always the neighbor next door, the teacher or heck, any older lady. So when does one become a Ma’am? When you’re married? Have children? Reach a certain age? I have never considered myself of a certain age! What exactly is that magic age that one officially becomes a Ma’am? Now being only 26 this isn’t something that I thought I would have to consider any time soon. Now, no offense to the Ma’am s out there, but I am not one. Right? Age is creeping up on me and so is this apparent dilemma! Am I really that matronly lady that exudes Ma’amness. Is Ma’amness even a word? When did I go from a young trophy wife (yeah right) to a old motherly Ma’am. I see it is time for me to reclaim my previous status. I refuse to be a Ma’am!
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26!!! I have tooth fillings older then you! I would not worry about your Ma’amness. I’m sure the young man saw a woman balancing kids and as surprising as it is in this day and age but he showed respect. I mean you are someone’s mother and a “Hey babe.” just wouldn’t cut it. At your place in the time line age is not creeping up on you…it’s still waiting in line to get a ticket…at my age (48) it’s sitting in the seat next to me and we are making plans. And this Ma’am does not take offence as with age comes wisdom…
Why does Ma’amness have to be matronly, or old and motherly??? I was in the states a few weeks back and i loved it when someone in the shop or hotel or whatever would say ‘yes ma’am’ or ‘can i help you ma’am’. Yes i am 51 but i’m far from being ‘matronly’. People should be so polite in the UK…they usually look at you and say …’yes?’ and then look at you like you’re disturbing their peace. Or even worse, ‘Yes, Love’…LOVE???? I’m not their Love. Give me Ma’am any day.
I would take “Ma’am” over “sweetie”!!! Actually the clerk was being polite which seems to be a dying thing these days. I’d be insulted with “Miss” - that’s too young…and Ali is rightm Hey Babe just isn’t okay…our coffee stand employees call everyone Sweetie, Hun or Babe - blech! Okay, I’ll admit it - and occasional “hello young lady” makes my day - coming from the right person.
I have to say I always use the word Ma’am when Im dealing with lady customers at the store I work at!
If I happen to be introduced by the salesperson who brings the customer to the paying desk & I’m given a name then I use the name…but otherwise I use Sir for the blokes & ma’am for the ladies. Having said that..I probabaly wouldnt use Ma’am toward anyone much under 25 and fall back on a plain ‘ may I help u there?” ‘MIss’ just seems…wrong…’lady’..nahhh..’oi Mrs’ ….doesn’t sound good either and Im the wrong side of 40 to be using babe, hon etc towards people I don’t know.
The word ,to my mind,provides a little more of a respectful tone when addressing lady customers & I’ve had no complaints so far. Old fashioned it probably is…but then I’m just an old fashioned girl! :)