Food in Mouth Problems, i.e. Chewing With Your Mouth Open
Nov 15th, 2006 by Jeremy
Today I thought I would pick an easy but much needed topic to discuss. Yes, chewing with your mouth open. If you read these first few sentences and find yourself perplexed that this could be a viable topic, then I am likely speaking directly to you.
Food is good. I love food, and recently my weight shows that fact a bit. I’m working on that, or least planning to :) There are really not that many foods I don’t like in fact. I enjoy the smells, flavors, satisfaction of being full. The only thing I really don’t like about food is seeing it in your mouth or hearing the process of it being chewed (mastication for all you over-educated types). There is not much in this world that bugs me more than this. If you want to drive me out of a room, I have just clued you in to a very simple way it can be done.
I have kids, four of them in fact, therefore this is an annoyance I deal with on a daily basis. I know my kids think of me as the grumpy old guy that is constantly reminding them to close their mouth when they chew, not to talk with their mouth full, etc. They need to establish the good habits now, not only for my sanity by that of all the other well mannered people of the world. Yet, with kids I have much more patience for it; hey, their kids. They are learning and they do try, their attention span just isn’t developed well enough to allow them to realize that what I just told them still applies 30 seconds later. They will get it eventually, if they live that long….
You all know exactly what I am talking about, admit it. Ever had a group of friends over for a meal, and there is that one guy (yes, usually a guy) that thinks the best time to talk is right after having taken a bite? Usually this person is annoying on many levels, including feeling the need to comment on every point made by someone else. This incessant need to continually be a part of the conversation prevents them from fully enjoying a single bit of food without displaying it for the rest of us to observe. Does he want us to see that he is eat the food, or does he really not want our eye contact when he is talking, because that is what ends up happening. We all try to look at each other, our plates, anywhere other than in his direction while bits of food splatter the plate, tablecloth and serving dishes around him. I try to take note of what was in his vicinity and avoid any seconds of that food item. Ever seen someone ask that a dish of food be passed their direction only for them to place it by them and not take any? There’s a reason…think hard, you’ll get it.
What really gets me is adults that haven’t picked up this simple ability to keep those lips together once you have put something in it. I don’t care if it is a meal at a table, snack in the office, gum in the car or nachos at the game. I am sure that food is great, I just don’t want to see or hear it in the process! You’re an adult, you’ve had a long time to pick up the skill. I think the worst part is my inability to say anything corrective to an adult on such a simple thing. Yes, my wife knows this drives me nuts, I can tell her anything of course. She is actually very good at the closed mouth thing, but I can’t even stand hearing a juicy apple chewed up right next to me when I am watching a show - this she does without thinking but gets the message when I pause the show until she is done with her apple :)
If you have any inclination to think I am wrong on this topic, and I’m not, just do a quick search on the web about “chewing with your mouth open.” Before I write most posts on this site I like to do a quick Google search to see what other people think. There is no shortage of comments. This “rate-it” site is just one example.
Back to adults though. Why can’t I say anything, because then I am the annoying guy that barks at people about stupid little things, like I’m perfect and don’t have annoying habits. Not going to be that guy. So, instead, I just fume, and try usually unsuccessfully to not notice it. Ever tried to do that, not notice things that bug you now that you have noticed it? Doesn’t happen. So what can I do? I think I am doing it now - try to raise my kids up right write about it here so that hopefully, maybe just a few people in the world will take note and shut their mouths, at least when there is food in it.
I can vouch for Jeremy’s difficulties with this, even when you chew with your mouth closed, you can be too loud for him. Growing up he would *scream* because he sat next to me, all because I chewed too loud.
And back then I thought he was just trying to give me a complex.
Wearing food. I love the people who cannot seem to get food just in their mouth. You know, that little bit of pizza sauce on their chin.
The normal response to someone of this sort would be…. “Are you saving that for later?” I have another idea. Instead of bringing it to their attention allowing them to save face and wipe it off, try allowing them to wear it for a while enjoying the rest of the night on the town. As people give them weird looks, stand behind your friend signaling the on-lookers with the old “He has had too much to drink” gestures.
It is really fun.
It grosses me out when people chew with their mouths open. It even grosses me out when little kids have food all over their faces. But that is a rant in and of itself! YUCK!
Neil….I must say that I totally guilty of wearing my food. Not on my face (wouldn’t someone FEEL if there was a dribble on their chin?) but on my shirt, and if I am wearing white it is destined to happen. No matter how careful I am it always seems to drip on my shirt. My husband teases me relentlessly about it. If I even put a white shirt on, he says that something will eventually drip on my shirt. And he is usually right! Argh!
That is the funny thing. You would think someone could feel sauce or dribble on their chin. Maybe they are so caught up in the moment of eating that delightful bbq chicken that they put off wiping their face. Then by the end of the meal they have forgotten it is there. LOL.
Don’t get me wrong. I am not hatin’ I love it. I have a family member that is guilty of this and usually, halfway through a meal, we have side bets running on how long it will take for him to realize that he forgot to wipe his chin. Hey, it keeps the night interesting. What fun huh?
Have to totally agree with you on this one Jeremy, the sound of someone eating really makes me shiver inside and of course if they are eating with their mouths open, even just for a few seconds, then the noise is far worse EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!! Same as you as well in that I must seem like a real pain to my kids who I have constantly gone on at them abut it - I have to say, my grown daughter (18) never eats with her mouth open, so the nagging worked.
Neil, I like your idea of not letting on when someone has foodstuff on their face, very good, have to try that sometime.
I believe it is all caused by a genetic mutation that causes modern day humans to eat like we still live in the trees (and I wouldn’t be surprised it NOVA has a show on it soon) or I blame it on the Fast Food industry! You know all you lip smackers, finger lickers, slurppers, burpers and cud chewers…how can anyone expect genteel table manners when the current generation was raised in Fast Food restaurants? It’s not dining with the Queen eating meals served out of cardboard boxes by a guy in a clown suit…come on people! I don’t see linen napkins and the good china serving up a meal called The Whopper. The good manners that our Father Knows Best parents instilled in us during the 50’s early 60’s (showing my age here) has been slowly pushed aside in the rush rush of today’s world. Good manners take time and thought…and…effort…need I say more?
Ali…amen sista! Manners have gone the way of courtesy, respect and kick the can!
I have to admit this bugs the crap outta me! My father chewed with his mouth open…still does…& my 19 year old son does. Ive tried every meal time for the last 19 years to get him to CLOSE HIS MOUTH when chewing but he just doesn’t get it. He knows it grates on me…it’s like dragging nails down a chalk board…it gives me the willies & I have to leave the room often. Course the family laughs at my dilemma..but am I really asking too much??????
Caroline - that is even worse if they are doing it knowingly! I don’t think I’d last but a few meals before knocking someone upside the head. At least with my kids they TRY to fix the problem - not do it intentionally and laugh about it. Ugh.
My boyfriend chews with his mouth up and it drives me bonkers. And its a habit that we’ve been trying to break for ever. Any suggestions? LOL
Just told a coworker to not eat in my workspace. I have to leave the room when her or my boss take out something to eat. She did that the other day-took out her cheerios. I left the room in midsentence before she got a chance to start. Then she followed my to my work area. I told her I had to leave the room whenever she or my boss were eating. As she stood there staring at me with this dumb look and slurping up her cheerios, I told her really. This is my space. If you insist on making all that noise to eat, go back to your own space.
I did not feel the need to be any more polite about it than that.
Judging by all the other noises that started coming out of her office, I’d say she’s pretty pissed.
Oh well. My boss is getting told next.
Mike, you are my hero. I can think of no better way to hand it then that. Mouth noises are unacceptable, particularly the wet banana noise. A woman in the cubicle next to me makes wet mouth noises when she eats. She also whistles verrrry softly in a breathy way all day long. Would like to punch her in the *** cheeks, but instead have purchased a decent pair of headphones and block the sound out with music.
Jeremy, there must be some way we can raise awareness about this horribly disgusting habit that, unfortunately, a lot of people have acquired. I know I freak out at people who chew near me–it’s gotten to the point where I just don’t eat around other people.
Eric, it’s close to impossible, I’ve found, for the person making the noise to– 1) realize they are doing it, and 2) correct the behavior.
One example: After years of staring in horror at my friend while she ate, I finally worked up the courage to say, “You know, you chew with your mouth open.” And she looked at me IN MID BITE, of course, and said: “Yeah, I know,” and went back to eating.
How do you do it? How do you tell someone to stop? I share an office with someone and he chews his food in full volume while smacking his lips? What can I say and still maintain a cordial relationship with him?
I am so thankful that I am not crazy or super anal about this. My co-worker, a professional adult woman, does not know how to chew with her mouth closed. The lip smacking, the slurping, the chew sounds, I go mad! worst part is, I am usually doing my paperwork on the computer while she is behind me eating her lunch. I am too much of a weakling to say anything. I practice saying something to her in the car, I think about it at home before work. I am going crazy and she has no idea. I guess every time it happens I am still so shocked that she has no idea that she has horrible manners that I am too dumbfounded to act!
what can we do that is tactful and respectful but at the same time helps meet our needs as ‘mannered’???
Hey and Sarah,
Honestly I really have never been able to come up with a good way to address the situation other than head on. You can of course use tact and perhaps a little humor to lighten the mood about it, but otherwise you have to be pretty direct on the topic for people to realize that you actually *are* asking them to stop.
Rather than making a big deal out of it, though, I would simply mention it to them the next time it comes up. Perhaps start with a little humor like “wow, that lunch really sounds good.” They may smile or be a little surprised, depending on the person. Then I would just mention it with a smile saying “you know I may be really sensitive to it, but the sound of people eating just kills me.” Would you mind eating in the break room or at leat keeping the food sounds down?” At that point it is up to them to be offended or laugh about it with you.
Steer clear of letting them know their manners suck…that tends to put them on the defense for some reason :)
Please help!!! My best friend’s boyfriend is the nastiest eater I have EVER seen or HEARD!! I cannot take it anymore. I don’t have the heart to say anything to the boyfriend because it would hurt his feelings. My friend is the type to tell me to suck it up and deal with it. Occasionally this guy has even snorted while eating with his mouth open. He slurps his wine, then smacks his lips and then belches and don’t EVEN put a plate of crab legs in front of him, or caramels, or nuts or a marshmallow for that matter!!!!! Is this an attempt to get attention? I need to know wWHY someone eats like this and I need to know if I am to just suck it up and deal with it or tell him or just avoid them all together and hope my friend dumps him??!! I seriously CANNOT TAKE IT ANYMORE!
I live with my boyfriend and a good mutual friend of ours. My friend and I work together, and ALWAYS end up venting (veins bulging from our necks) about the previous nights meal. Although the blame being put on the fast food industry is probably very true in some cases, we have resolved that it is ultimately his MOTHERS FAULT! After close investigations, we found that she, too, eats like a horse. It’s like they would rather eat than breathe. Instead of taking his or her time eating, they insist on eating and (loudly) breathing simultaniously.
Another aspect of bad table manners relates to “that guy” who likes having platters, bags of chips, and (always) shared meals in VERY close proximity to him. Here’s our take on it: getting his “fare share” is his first priority. If anyone else, heaven forbid, gets even one more french fry than him, he feels that he got screwed. There is a dicotomy within this issue. Oh, yes. Speed eating. Who ever eats the fastest gets the most.
Last, but NOT least, the ultimate “nails on a chalk board”— utincels. Spoons: If you know someone similar to the above description, you will surely know of this annoyance. Soups, chili, cereal, etc. This is what goes through the mind, “Oh, God. It’s so good. I MUST get every last bite. Every last morsel. Every last grain of pepper.” KLING KLING KLING KLING KLING KLING. KLING KLING. KLING. Hidious.
Fork & Knife: Most people learned at an early age to saw NOT draw. This particular cave man cuts any type of meat by piercing it with his fork (so far so good). Next he uses his knife, not as a slicing tool, but more like a tearing utencil. I dont even know how to explain it. What I do know is that it litterally does make a noise like nails on a chalk board. Only in the comfort of my own home. End of story. Im so pissed off.
I hear alot about kids needing to mind their manners about chewing with their lips closed. That’s nothing. I eat with my dad twice a day and listen on while he masticates his food, smacking loudly and displaying it for all to see. Then after, picking his teeth with ocassional sucking noises. It discusts me to no end. But alas, mentioning it wouldn’t help, ( I have) he’s been doing it all his life, so doubt if he’ll change now, unlike a child that can be taught. Perhaps, I should don earplugs at meal time.
I agree 100% that this may be the most annoying popular habit (lack of manners). I have a co-worker who smacks open mouthed all day which drives me insane. To me it’s like nails on a chalkboard. If you haven’t yet seen the website gumblasters.com it’s worth a look. While I don’t think abolishing gum or food is the answer there are obviously many people who feel the same regarding the lack of manners. People, it’s easy, close your mouth when chewing. Thank you Mike for bringing this up.
This is one of the most disgusting habits that I can think of. Right up there with throwing cigarette butts on the ground!
God. My mother has recently (last 18 months) developed the habit if chewing with her mouth open. I can’t stand it. I have told her she sounds like a dog liking its ***, and she says that if other people don’t like it, they can leave. I can actually hear her chewing across the room. She spits food when she talks now, and she is seeing nothing wrong with this. In addition, my father has now fallen into the habit. It has gotten so bad that I purposely don’t invite her to things any more, because I can’t stand her, especially since shes always chewing gum.
I has gotten me so mad in the past, because she chewed loud, with her mouth open, on purpose, that I actually had to go into the bathroom just to avoid smacking her across her face. I cracked my middle knuckle punching the wall.
Oh yes this is TERRIBLE. I couldn’t stand to sit close to my mother growing up because of her DISGUSTING chewing noises- and if someone does it with their mouth open, I leave the table. It has to be the fact that so few people ever tell them how nasty they are, coupled with our culture’s ‘I don’t give a **** about anyone else’s comfort and this is somehow empowering and admirable,’ that has created this phenomenon.
So funny. In fact, my SO got into a HUGE argument over this habit just last night. People who chew with their mouth open should be dragged into a dentist office, mouths wired shut and given liquid diets until they can learn some friggin’ manners. Needless to say, my SO says he should be able to eat any way he **** well pleases in his own **** house and I should stop telling him to stop. I guess it’s a “my problem” thing and I will leave the table and leave him there to look like the cow he portrays. Thanks for posting this.